Can Only Move Forward

Finish the Sentence Friday

And now for this week’s sentence to finish:  “I hit a turning point in my life when I…”  lost my job….

Over two years ago I was laid off from a teaching job that I thought was secure. I thought I would get called back or at least find another job, but that did not happen.
Week after week, month and month, I felt useless and hopeless. I was not getting called on interviews and couldn’t just work in a store making less than it would cost to pay for daycare. September came and I was jobless and scared out of my mind. I did not know what was going to happen. It created a rift in our marriage as our debt and stress grew. Very quickly we had no choice but to declare bankruptcy. This is not where I saw my life going. This is not what my dreams and hopes were based on, I did not ask for this.
As a full year passed, gone were the dreams of
  • selling our condo and purchasing a house
  • having a home that Dino could grow up in and call his own
  • having a yard in which Dino and Balboa could play
  • going through IVF again and having another baby

While I got called to my original job, I was laid off again. I was not expecting that and all the fear and horror hit me again. What else could I lose?  Thankfully I moved on to a similar job, but the damage was done and our lives would never be the same.

While my dreams were gone, I realized that I could make new dreams and not all was bad. While this was not my plan, I found and strength in what I could endure. I found power in the things that I could control. I found a peace that came when there was nothing left to lose.

With great sadness, we had to find an apartment to rent. In our town the pickings were slim and we felt we were going got be stuck in a tiny apartment in a huge complex. Thankfully we found an apartment, in the center of town. This apartment was much smaller than our condo, but had a shared driveway, shared yard, and a garage.

  • Dino and Balboa DID have a yard to play and I don’t have to walk across a parking lot just to take Balboa out.
  • Dino can ride his bike, play ball, and play in his pool in his OWN yard.
  • We are still in town and Dino can stay at his daycare and eventually could see the same kids in his school.
  • I have another job, similar job, and while I am commuting I am enjoying listening to books on tape.
  • We have a washing machine and dryer in our house, no longer to do I have to lug baskets up and down steps and in and out of buildings.
  • We have a home. Other families all over the nation in similar situations, lost it all. We didn’t, we were lucky. 

I could have continued to wallow in misery and let the negativity take over, but instead I chose to find the joy and happiness in our lives. I need to show Dino that while things may no turn out the way you expected, while you may have to make adjustments, they do turn out in a way that works for you. You may have a long journey with many bumps in the road, it may take a while to get there, but you WILL get there and appreciate it more because of the journey. I do have my sad days, but in the end I know I am blessed.

And next week’s sentence to finish:  ”The hardest part of my day is…

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28 responses to “Can Only Move Forward

  1. You have an amazing attitude and perspective. I have a good friend who just declared bankruptcy, and she feels so much relief and peace it has changed her life. Thank you so much for sharing your story with us- great way to finish the sentence!

  2. Karen, I am so sorry that this happened to you. I, too, lost my teaching job due to lay-offs and the economy and I know exactly what you mean here about feeling helpless and how money or the lack thereof does have a way of creating all sorts of issues. I am thankful too that we are able to share my parent’s mother daughter, while we have been saving for a house and just having a roof over our head. Thank you for sharing this and please know I can very much relate.

  3. I think the most character building lessons we teach our kids is when they watch us struggle with adversity, adjust our expectations, hold our heads high and move on.
    You are providing everything Dino needs. And he knows it.

  4. Filling bankruptcy is so hard! I had to do it due to medical bills when the Lukester was small. He had severe epilepsy and had seizures that would last over 20 minutes. when it gets to that point then the chance of permanent brain damage is likely. So we spent a lot of time in the PICU. And had a lot of medical bills. That was a long time ago and today I have my dream house. Of course, things aren’t easy right now and I’m not sure if I’ll get to keep said house. But we’ll pull through. I’ve done it before. You’ve done it before. It’s all good! 🙂

    • (HUGS) how scary babe, I am glad he is doing well now. it’s frustrating when you just want one thing to go right, but then look at your awesome family, right?

  5. I love how you found the good in the situation, and instead of giving up your dreams, you’ve adjusted them. Thank you for sharing!

  6. This economy sucks!! Okay I got that out of my system. My job downsized about a year and a half ago. I was stressed, but thankfully we had been working many more years so the financial end wasn’t so bad. I know it must have been horrible for you!! I just hope that things continue to improve and someday you can look back at this time and smile about all you went through.

    • yes, thanks babe. I already feel we learned so much from this experience and value the things that are really important to us now.

  7. Things didn’t turn out how you planned. I hate when that happens! I am like you, one who plans and I hate when life gets in the way. I am glad you were able to turn the corner and realign your dreams.

  8. very inspiring Post. (Not just) about the turning points (in life) but how to see the path, respond to the path that unfolds in front of all of us as we live our lives the best we can. (bravo)

  9. I’m sorry your family has had a rough time, but I give you a lot of credit for finding the positive things. You’re right, many people are in tougher situations. I hope you continue to find the joy and happiness- life’s too short to do stay negative!

  10. Such a true and positive outlook on life. Sometimes it’s much easier to get overwhelmed by the what if’s and the oh no’s and we lose sight of the blessings placed in our lives because we’re too busy being miserable. I’ve met and known several people like that. I honestly believe that some of those hardest, biggest stumbling blocks are put in our path to make us the people we are today. I’m glad you are able to see the positive and to keep moving forward.

  11. Wow, I appreciate your bravery at sharing this and please know that you are not alone. I declared bankruptcy many years ago at the urging of my ex husband and it was tough but life is better now. So glad you shared and wonderful way to finish the sentence.

    • thanks babe (HUGS) I know it’s a tough experience, but a journey worth making it through. There really is always light at the end of the tunnel.

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